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Geeks Guide To A Festival 

7/20/2013

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School is out. With exams over it means six weeks of freedom. Or possibly sheer boredom for those of you who take your studies more seriously. The initial elation of finishing that last exam can turn into turmoil as you while away the days avoiding chores around the house and trying to get into cricket as the Ashes seems to be the only thing on TV.

But it need not be this way! Summer is traditionally the time of festivals the world over – and Britain is no different. There are hundreds of festivals nationwide. It doesn’t matter if you live in Cumbria or the Isle of White, there are a lot of people having fun somewhere near you and a lot of them probably deserve it a lot less than you do! Wash away the lingering sense of failure that follows us all about as we wait for results day and join hundreds of others letting their hair down somewhere in a field in the nearest shire.

If it’s your first festival it will no doubt be a daunting venture. Which is why Make Me a Geek has compiled this thorough guide to help you out in ANY eventuality.

First of all you’ll need a ticket. This is a fairly essential bit of kit for any festival. It might go without saying but nothing ruins a festival more than watching a group of your closest friends being ushered through a mild frisking into a land brimming with weird workshops, fun clothes and some of the world’s best musicians. Get a ticket. And guard it with your life. 

Now the best source would clearly be the official site. But if they have sold out there is always Gumtree. It offers a free service for you to buy tickets from people who can no longer attend. Remember if you do have to use Gumtree make sure you are getting the real ticket, not an e-mail print out. Print outs can be replicated and would lead to the same situation detailed above if someone has already scanned through with the same printed ticket.

Try not to get hung up on the big festivals. Although they tend to attract bigger acts, they are usually a lot more brash and brazen. Smaller festivals can be just as much fun, often giving you the chance to discover something new!

Second of all you will need to find a group of friends to go with. This will involve adding at least 1 person to your current group, for all you budding mathematicians. It’s a chance for you all to celebrate the hard work you have put in throughout the year, and finally raise a glass to bid farewell to the last of the more dreary assignments.

A top tip is to implement a ‘no study materials’ rule among your friends. Under no circumstances do exercise books or reading lists need much attention during this time – no matter how important your lecturer/teacher insists they are. For one, they will probably be heavy and large enough to fill space that could be used for pointless novelty clothing. Secondly it may severely hinder the chance of you having any fun at all.

Next you will need a sturdy rucksack. This will be your lifeline and the last thing you want is to be picking up all your clothes out of the mud in a busy queue at the entrance. In said bag you should consider taking the following:

  • A change of clothes.
  • An anorak (essential for British festivals).
  • Camping stove for food.
  • Easy-to-cook food such as noodles, beans, soups.
  • Water (to live).
  • Money in a sealable bag.
  • A sleeping bag.
  • Sunglasses (they look cool).
  • Several items of silly clothing. Ditch the tie… unless it’s sparkly, gold or silver.
  • A cheap phone. Essential for finding lost friends but taking an iPhone 5 will only end in tears.

Make sure you label every item. It is worth putting your name on all your equipment to put off any opportunistic scamps looking for an easy meal. Marking your territory works in the wild and it works at festivals – but don’t copy your dog.

Next it is worth finding out who has a tent. You can never be too prepared but asking around prevents everybody from bringing one. There is always the risk of these tents never making it home, so make sure you don’t make any promises to your old man about his trusty two-man he took up Ben Nevis. Instead head over to the nearest supermarket, they usually have a great selection of reasonably priced camping equipment, including a cheap tent.

After you have covered these basic steps all you need is a good attitude and sense of adventure. Go have fun, summer is shorter than you think B-)


By Alex Gregory
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